Dreams aren’t real unless you make them so Part 2

After getting out of jail I had no possessions left really. I would take my daughters car to look for jobs but always ended up driving by the jail. That was the one place I knew now. I knew what to expect there. It was hard being out here a stranger to my life. I was clean however and trying to survive. My husband who had disappeared contacted me a couple weeks after I got out. I ended up meeting him and going to his dads to stay. I knew my kids would not accept this decision. I chose him over them. Not my proudest moment but it is the truth. We ended up renting a house and trying to start over but meth was still a factor a bit. For me. He was still using daily and I didn’t really know. Christmas 2016 he left again. I was home alone and in a super dark place. I literally laid on the bathroom floor and cut myself for hours hoping it would work and I could now disappear. I woke up to him coming into the bathroom. Cusing and he called an ambulance. I was 72 houred and sent to a mental health facility in Allen parish. I was there a week where is was diagnosed with major depression. They put me on meds and I went home January 2 2017. When I got there it was not a pretty sight. I’m not going into details because I have forgiven and won’t publically say things that would cause any hurt. We ended up working through things. I was completely clean but he still struggled. The next couple months we’re hard. Then we added 2 people my family member who was a fugitive and things went terribly bad again. Another huge fight and I left to go back with my kids. They had a house now in new llano. I did start drinking really bad at this time. And basically me and my daughter had a huge fight and I moved out. Across the street to my friends house. She had a closed in back porch that I made my home for a few months. I went to court finally and my husband left the state to go back to California. I took a plea and got 3 years probation and drug court. Now things would slowly start climbing back up.

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